Local Gossip
Local Gossip, brought to you by your sweet and ever loving Baker
The citizens of Besnitt has noticed that as of late the Ubar’s behind seems to be growing. The reason? Too many sticky buns. We urge all kajirae to give our Ubar an extra slap on the behind each time you see him – it looks nice and soft doesn’t it, girls?
A note on the noticeboard clearly states that the Ubar and Ubara of Vonda suck a certain animal’s more intimate body part. What brought that on? What has the poor Baker been forced to go through that caused such an outburst? Lets all give her our support!
It’s been noticed as of late that the men of Besnitt have stinky feet. The odor spreading as boots come off is nauseating. Thus, we urge our fine Physicians to look into the matter, because Free Companions and slaves alike are suffering in the furs when the men’s footwear come off!
Sir Omar, Second Sword of Besnitt , was spotted by a slave one late night as he snuck into the empty infirmary. His business? Our informant tells us he nicked candy from the jar the physicians keep in the building – he almost emptied the entire pot! Who’s got a sweet tooth, hm?
During the latest raid it was said that our Butcher lost his arm. Chopped off by the shoulder apparently. The gruesome event is nothing but tragic. So please good folks of Besnitt, if you see the Butcher about, lend him a hand will you?
Our new Tavern Master Tristan is apparently down on his luck. The outrageous costs for a mere bowl of water charged by him leads us to believe the poor fellow is in need of money. Spare him a copper tarsk next time you see him – we do not want the Tavern to go under!
Something’s cooking! One of Besnitt’s Blue, the Scribe Lady Lena, seems to be wearing bigger and bigger gowns. What’s hiding under all them skirts? Has she been doing things she’s not supposed to do? Or has her love for baked goods finally begun to leave it’s traces on her?
The beast named Fia (Fey Falconer) has a secret. Well, it’s not a secret anymore. Apparently she can’t swim. When ordered by the Baker to take a dip, she got in the water, but just stood there, unmoving. Outrageous!! Every slave needs to learn how to swim! Who volunteers to give swimming classes to the slaves? Contact Besnitt Times if interested.
That was all for this time, folks!
If YOU hear or see something interesting in the City, please contact the Besnitt Times. There just might be a small reward for good tips and news!
❤Regards, your sweet and ever loving Baker Nadija❤
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